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- 024 Choosing Praise in Your Marriage
024 Choosing Praise in Your Marriage
3 minute read that will bless your marriage all week
Happy Thursday! It’s Edward from Elevate Your Marriage. There are more than 60 marriage’s in the Bible and in this week’s newsletter I want to share 1 of them with you!
The marriage of Jacob & Leah has taught me much about responding to challenges in my own marriage. As you read or listen, I pray it will bless and do the same for you. Yes\p, I said listen - new feature alert - click “Listen Online” - top right of this page. Cool right? Now, you can listen to the newsletter anytime, anywhere.
Jacob and Leah are one of my favorite favorite couples in the Bible!
Verse of the Week: Read all of Genesis 29 to really get the whole story.
And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” Therefore she called his name Judah.Then she ceased bearing. Genesis 29:35
Quick disclaimer: In Leah’s story it was children, but really we can use any and everything as leverage to “fix” marriage challenges. I don’t encourage using or having kids to improve a marriage - it doesn’t work. 🤷🏾
So then here is what this marriage IS about: Choice between external fixes or internal peace, in the real challenges of your marriage.
In Genesis 29:11, one of the funniest verses in the Bible, Then Jacob kissed Rachel, and raised his voice and wept. Jacob saw Rachel, kissed her & cried 🤣. In contrast, Leah is described as “weak of eye”. Most think that means she was hard to look at - unattractive. However, I believe it’s means she had light colored eyes…
Either way, important point is Jacob loved Rachel who was “beautiful of form & face” but hated her “weak of eye” sister Leah. Jacob’s “hatred” wasn’t a personality issue, Leah wasn’t mean or difficult, just weak of eye. It's a surface issue about her appearance…
So then, here’s a woman married to a man that’s also married to her sister. He loves her younger sister, hates her & they’re only married because her father tricked Jacob to marry her. Whatever challenges we face - it’s not Jacob & Leah level of bad.
Whether your marriage is good, strong & healthy or strained & struggling day to day, Leah’s approach can give us clarity in what I consider to be the epitome of a tough marriage.
And, name Leah gives her 1st 3 children literally tell us how she hopes to fix her marriage:
Reuben: literally means, “Look a son”. Leah thought by giving Jacob a son he would begin to love her. It didn’t work.
Simeon: literally means to “Hear and Understand”. If Leah could get Jacob to hear & understand what she was going through - he’d love her. It didn’t work.
Levi: means “Attached” & now her goal has shifted from love to just staying attached because - for the sake of it. Love isn’t even mentioned this time…
So her 1st 3 attempts to fix her marriage are summarized like this: Look at what I’ve done. Hear & Understand what I’m going through and Let’s just stick it out just because.
These are the same just do something , “external” approaches many couples today try: If I make more money 💰, lose weight, gain weight, fix a flaw, or change my appearance than my husband or wife will love me. Welp. It didn’t work for Leah & it’s not a long term solution for us either.
Peace Comes in the Praise:
And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” Therefore she called his name Judah.Then she ceased bearing.Genesis 29:35
Wow. That’s different:
This Time: Leah came to a place where the same “external” approach wasn’t going to work. “This Time”, Leah was choosing a new way to find peace in her marriage.
Praise the Lord: The new approach was a switch from “external fix” to the Lord. No longer about Jacob changing & loving her. Now, the focus was on the Lord. We too can choose: either keep looking at what we are looking at and feeling how we feel OR choose to Praise the Lord.
Throw it on the Lord: Just as her other children’s names were a literal approach. This child, Judah literally means “Throw it on the Lord”. It's a different praise. Not a Sunday morning church praise, this praise is to throw it on the Lord, Do you have an “it” that you’ve been carrying? Refocus, throw “it” on the Lord.
Ceased: After Reuben, Simeon & Levi, she had to try something else. With a changed approach she stopped having children (at least for the moment). Apart from Christ we keep having to provide solutions.
Take Away: Judah, as Hebrews 7:14 mentions, is the line which Christ comes from. Judah, Leah’s son, is also the only 1 of the 12 children of Israel (Jacob) mentioned in the Matthew 1 lineage of Christ. There’s no mention that Jacob ever changed & fell in love with Leah, yet she found a place of significance in Christ, peace in her reality and a forever, aligned with the family of God.
Marriage has its ups and downs. Is it time for a new approach? This time throw “it” on the Lord.
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P.S. But Grow in Grace Newsletter, for men is now out every Monday. If you are, or know a man that wants to grow in relationship with Christ? https://growing-in-grace.beehiiv.com/subscribe
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