022 -Don't. Look. Back.

3 minute read that’ll bless your marriage all week

But Lot’s wife, behind him, looked back, and she became a pillar of salt. Genesis 19:26

A few weeks ago I had a conversation with a guy, Bill, that I met in my local Starbucks. His wife passed away 2 years ago and he wrestles with her loss - daily. During 1 of the lighter points of the conversation he shared the time she listed out everything he did wrong in their 27 year marriage. When she finished, he asked if she wanted him to also list all her mistakes. To which she simply said, “No”.

That’s the point of today’s newsletter: As God moves you forward. Don’t. Look. Back. Don’t get/stay stuck on what’s behind as God is leading forward.

In Genesis 19:15-26, God was destroying Sodom but His 2 angels provided an escape plan for Lot, his wife and daughters.

“Escape for your life. Do not look back or stop anywhere in the valley. Escape to the hills, lest you be swept away.” 

A simple instruction, don’t look back and don’t stop in the valley. But…not looking back is hard and even with clear instruction

“…Lot’s wife, behind him, looked back, and she became a pillar of salt”.

Whether her turning into salt was literal or figurative it’s clear, it’s not something we want. Here then are 5 points to consider for your own marriage about “looking back”:

1. Don’t linger: Lot’s wife turned into a pillar of salt, “But he lingered” (Genesis 19:16). God moves couples forward toward safety. Seek to hear His instruction and then don’t allow yourselves to linger, to hesitate, or stay when God is leading your marriage forward.

2. Don’t. Don’t means do not do it (LOL). A principle we pick up in Romans 5 is that wherever there’s a rule we break it. Like telling a child not to touch, don’t: can entice to do the very thing we know not to do. Make letting go of what happened in the valley a matter of prayer. Lord, give me strength not to harp, hold on and look back… 

3. Look. In Luke 17:32-33 Jesus says “Remember Lot’s wife.” He explains her “look back” as an attempt to save her own life. In the bigger picture, she missed the power God’s kingdom of God by trying to preserve her own life. Don’t miss God’s present power and way forward by looking back. Whatever you keep looking at you will keep seeing - in your spouse and marriage. Let’s pray to get our eyes off the him or her we are married to so we can see God leading us forward.  

4. Back. It is hard to move forward while looking back. On a recent Elevate Your Marriage podcast episode my friend Dr. Harold Arnold for encouraged us, “Do a favor for a future version of your marriage, what your marriage will be in the future is 100% contingent on what your practicing (in the Lord) today”. As a couple, allow God to lead you out of valley’s today to stand on mountain tops together in a future version of your marriage.

5. Mountains and Valleys. Every valley in marriage sits between 2 mountains. Appreciate both. Focus more on the God who leads out of valleys more than focusing on staying where your marriage is - now. Lead us Lord.

That’s it: Don’t Look Back. As always, THANK YOU for sharing this newsletter with friends that need some encouragement. Use links at social media links at top of page to check out and comment (hint.hint) on posts about this article.

P.S. Some big news! I’m starting a 2nd newsletter just for men called “Growing in Grace”. I am super excited, so men look for the sign up next week - first newsletter comes out Tuesday, August 6th.

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