016 Do Wedding Vows Still Matter - After Your Married

3 minute read that will bless your marriage all week

Wedding Vows are a part of every wedding ceremony, but are they apart of every marriage? 

From married a long time to about to get married soon…here is a really important question, do you think your wedding vows matter after you are married?

As I tell every couple as I go over their wedding vows during our last pre-marital session before they say “I do”, “If you are going to stand before an eternal all wise God, you probably should know what it is you are saying”. The point being, so many couples enter into marriage reciting vows they are told to recite but without a clear understanding what they are vowing to. As many have said, “Your vows will keep you if you keep them”.

So whether it was an uncertainty from the start or that life has done its thing and the punch of the vows you took then have become forgotten between the 2 of you now, here are 5 things to connect your marriage to when it comes to your wedding vows.

1. Commitment to God: You were looking into each other’s eyes, but one of the more missed points is that our wedding vow was first and foremost made to God, then to the him or her He gave you in marriage.

2. Extremes of Married Life: For Richer for Poorer, In Sickness and In Health…in the extremes of life the “vow” is to remain steady. Now that you’re married you know how extreme married life can get. It is one thing to talk about poorer or sickness, but when life hits it’s your vow to the Lord and spouse to stay steady…

3. HolyEstate: Holy is what I call a Sunday morning word, meaning we use it all the time. But by definition, “holy” means altogether other or different. The commitment we made is to approach and treat our marriage like no other relationship we are in. “You don’t put something holy in the mud or in a vulnerable place”. Vow to treat your marriage altogether different.

4. & Forsaking All Others: It means what it says. We vow to not leave room or space for “others”. Think deeply on what that means/looks like in your relationship.

5. Value: Vow to love, honor and keep him or her as long as you live. Time and circumstance can dent and scratch how we treasure and value our spouse. If asked the value of our spouse we would put them in the category of invaluable. How does that align with how we consistently treat them. The vow is to continuously love them, honor them and keep them - forever.

Takeaway: It’s cool if you want to do a formal ceremony, but maybe just in the privacy of your home or on a walk in a quiet park, recommit, recenter on the vow to the Lord to live together in the holiness of marriage, in the extremes of married life, without space for others, with commitment to value your him or her - no matter what. Download the PDF of the line by line breakdown I share regarding wedding vows.

My wife and I first made this vow 21 years ago today (Happy Anniversary, Dear).

The latest podcast episode is about to drop on YouTube Podcasts and Spotify: Search Elevate Your Marriage and be blessed. This episode is with my good friend, Pastor Everette Pope and his book, Who Told You That You Were Naked? How to Walk on Top of the Oceans of Shame

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