014 David & Michal the Daughter of Saul - Pt2

3 minute read that will bless your marriage all week.

Hope all had a great Memorial Day weekend! 

This week in part 2 of our look at the marriage of David and Michal the Daughter of Saul I want to answer a key question about their marriage and your’s too...

In Pt 1, I shared that after David killed the giant, Goliath, Saul, king of Israel was jealous and vowed to kill David. As a way to gain access to David, Saul offered him his daughter in marriage. The point was, in 1 Sam 18, Michal the daughter of Saul loved David at the start of their marriage, by 2 Samuel 6, she despised him in her heart. That SHIFT, from LOVE to DESPISE is something many couples are experiencing right now - where things started is not where things are today, which begs a logical question:

What happened?

Well, here’s what happened:

Saul sent messengers to David's house to watch him, that he might kill him in the morning. But Michal, David's wife, told him, “If you do not escape with your life tonight, tomorrow you will be killed.” 1 Samuel 19:11

In short, David ran for his life. While running for his life made sense, it also caused a huge problem because the space created between them that night kept them apart many years. In that SPACE, that her father started, both David and Michal married other people. Which in part is why Michal the daughter of Saul despised David in her heart in 2 Samuel 6.

Here’s the point: Watch for, then get rid of space in your marriage!

Listen, I’ve shared the marriage’s of the Bible with couples for years and I love the principles these biblical marriage’s share. I also recognize there are huge cultural differences between married couples in the Bible and our marriage’s today. I get that. So, perhaps there was a cultural reason David didn’t take Michal the daughter of Saul with him when he ran.

Regardless of his reasons, here is our big takeaway for this week. It doesn’t matter why distance entered their marriage - it did. And when distance entered, David and the king’s daughter didn’t do enough to close the gap. Their inability to close the gap changed what started as LOVE to DESPISE.

Get it? Their marriage is like yours! They too experienced a BIG SHIFT from where they started to where they were presently. For them it was LOVE to DESPISE, maybe you may experience a SHIFT in communication or your sex life or trust or any and everything else… The point is, along the way, things can shift…& now we know why: Things shift when GAPS and space(s) is allowed between us. Whatever the reason why space comes - it damages the relationship just the same. 

For the last month my wife and I have met at 8:05 every weekday evening (we call it 5 at 8:05). Intentional talk time has helped us CLOSE our GAPS. Some nights we talk about something deep, other nights we don’t - we just laugh and make jokes. To us it doesn't matter what’s in those 5 minutes of time, it is 1 way we’ve been able to kick out space in our marriage and therefore we have enjoyed less pressure on our marriage.

Discussion Time: Read 1 Samuel 19:11-17 together and discuss in greater detail the Space in and Pressure on the marriage of David and Michal the Daughter of Saul.

1. What would you have done in that situation?

2. Where has space crept into your own relationship, how will you now work to CLOSE THE GAP?

Thanks for checking out this week’s newsletter. Do you know other couple’s in your family or church that could benefit from this message? Please share.

About next week: Why David’s wife is referred to as Michal the Daughter of Saul more than 20 times…Make sure to read next week’s newsletter, it will bless your marriage.

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